5 things in life you’re not doing enough
Life is tough. There’s no way around this one my friend. I’ve found through bitter experience that the easier I try and make my life the harder it becomes. So I’ve decided to ride the waves and let it pan out as it comes to me. I’ll solve my problems as they arise and not try and think of problems that haven’t arisen yet, or on the other side, brush them under the carpet. I was a prolific brusher under the carpet at one point in my life. Bad idea. Small problems become BIG problems. They escalate from there! I could run, but I couldn’t hide.
Thankfully I’ve learned to ride those waves really smoothly now and I’ve made life quite a happy ride so far, except for those unexpected problems. Luckily for you, I’m going to give you a smart list to hopefully improve your mental health and lifestyle:
My Mum and Step-Dad are always telling me off about how much I sleep, and to be quite frank I do sleep lots. But that is how much my body requires. And that’s fine. There was a time when I’d lay awake until 3am with anxiety, worrying about everything. Not now. My head hits the pillow and night night. Sleep is massively important for life balance. If I don’t sleep enough then I’m absolutely terrible the next day. I forget, I badly co-ordinate and I miss things. And I can’t just sleep badly for five days and sleep really well for one. I will have to sleep well for a further five. Ever heard of catching up on sleep? Yes? Because if I miss sleep, I owe it. Absolutely awesome guide to sleeping here.
Reasons I’m not getting enough sleep.
For me at the start it was Anxiety. I had an Anxiety disorder when I was younger and I’m absolutely sure it was Autism related. But, I haven’t been diagnosed for that so we’ll see. Anxiety would keep me awake until the early hours. I would worry about anything and everything. I sought my GP for help on that.
Sleep Apnea is another one. My wife thinks I have that. It’s where the air flow is restricted when I’m sleeping. I don’t know, but she tells me that I stop breathing for a moment or two and that she worries. I’ll be going to the doctors soon for this. And I also gave Vital Sleep a try which really helped me.
Or, it could be that I’m just excessively worrying about something. There have been times when work has been really stressful and I have lost sleep over it. No biggie, though. That’s what weekends are for!!
You may look at this heading and “laugh” – (see what I did there? Hah!), but studies have proven that laughter is really, really good for the improvement of your overall wellbeing. I try and make sure that I at least laugh ten times a day. With someone, at myself or at the TV. Wherever I can find the opportunity to do so. That is why comedy is very central to me. Comedy is awesome. And if you have a dry, horrible sense of humour. Don’t feel bad. I have too! Sometimes I laugh at things I shouldn’t laugh at. I inherited that from my Dad, sadly. There are lots of people that laugh at a whole range of things. So, play a prank on the wife, or husband. Fire up YouTube and watch some comedy sketches or go watch Comedy Central on TV. Seriously I feel a whole lot better.
Reasons why I don’t want to laugh
Depression can sometimes seep into our very existence and take the human that used to be there and replace it with a clone, devoid of all emotion and human nature. I understand that. I had clinical depression for many years. Often friends can abandon you, and family members, not knowing how to deal with your situation never visit. It can be hard. Perhaps next time surround yourself with your most happy, positive friends and laugh with them. Start off light. Remember old, funny stories and laugh hard. There was a time when I nearly got arrested. We all laugh hard about that! lol
Cry and cry loudly. Crying is a release of emotion. It’s when a situation arises that we can’t deal with emotionally because those emotions are far too strong. Crying releases those emotions. I can’t cry much. Mainly because I was brought up in an era where crying was for wimps and non-men. That and my Dad beat seven bells out of me for crying. Actually, crying is completely natural and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Perhaps crying in the middle of the street isn’t the best cause of action, but when I’m at home with the wife, or alone, sometimes crying is a great release. “It cleanses the soul” and by that I mean it releases those pent up frustrations. I always feel better after a good cry.
Reasons why I can’t cry
Well, there’s Dad, that and the social barriers men face when crying as young boys. We grow up thinking crying is unnatural and men shouldn’t cry. Which is completely off the charts silly. Let your boys cry, let them cry because they’re sad, angry or upset. I let my one cry. And I never mock him for doing so.
It’s one of these things I know not many people do. Rewarding yourself with some quality “you” time. Perhaps that’s time to go off and play the Xbox, or taking the camera out and snapping some lovely sunlit beach shots of the local seaside. Whatever your passion, make time in your busy schedule to take part in it. I love gaming, I also love writing and I love sunny days so that I can use my fancy semi-new DSLR camera. I make time to do all those things. Not all in one day! But make time to do these things at least three times per week. I also have a wife and son, but Natalie has her own hobbies and so does Alex. Sometimes it’s nice to take Alex out with me and Natalie can have some “her” time.
Why I’m not rewarding myself.
Sometimes we can get stuck in our routines. Especially the older we get. Sometimes we end up “just existing” eat, do chores, work, sleep and that’s it. And I can relate. There was a time in my life that was me. I became heavily stuck in a negative routine cycle. I recognise how important it is to sometimes clear my schedule and do something that matters to me. It doesn’t need to involve money. it could be a walk, or writing the next chapter in my book. But it needs to be something that I enjoy for myself. Because then I cross the bridge from “just existing” to “enjoying life”
If you don’t give regularly then you won’t actually know how nice it feels to give. Even better if you give without expecting anything in return. Giving without expecting anything in return can be one of the most rewarding things that you can do for yourself. The feeling inside that I know I helped someone today and they are now going to be well, or good, or sorted makes me feel good about myself. You can turn this on its head by saying it’s incredibly selfish to do so but then that’s looking too much into it. Since when was giving selfish? I’ve given money without wanting any back, given car-lifts to friends without wanting a return and so much more. You should try it. It’s an amazing feeling.
Why I don’t give.
Some people haven’t given much in their life and that’s absolutely fine. How will you know how to give if you weren’t taught to? I’d say start now. You have £20. Buy your friend a pint and not ask for it back. Buy him it because he’s your friend.
I wasn’t always a giver. I would give lots but always expect a return. In my head, I would be tallying up the score of who owes me one and who doesn’t. Now? That’s just too much hard work. Give, and forget. You might be surprised who will come rushing to your aid when you next need it! I have been many times.
Quite open to hearing any of your own suggestions. And, if you have a suggestion why not try it out on yourself. And if you have, tell me what it was like. I’d love to have your feedback on my 5 things in life you’re not doing enough 🙂