Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

Before I start here, I’d like to say beautiful women is always in the eye of the beholder. What I class as beautiful may be another mans trash heap and vice versa. I realised that early in life when my friends would joke about the ladies I had a fancy for, and yet, on the other hand they would go off and date someone equally as horrible (to me). Men’s tastes, believe it or not, vary wildly, and despite what you’ve heard, any hole is definitely not a goal. That saying is reserved for kids and pervy old men.

That being said all through my earlier years was spent befriending my perception of beautiful women and hanging out in their friendzone, not through choice might I add. But in that zone I learned a lot about their ups and downs, and what made them wetter than the last towel you dropped in the bath, and equally what turned them off like a light switch. It’s kind of crazy really, because in the general eyes of society, women are judged harshly by men, and their peers, but, I’ve found one thing to be an absolute constant.

They are just the same as you or I.

Strange saying that right? The girls in the bar you are too afraid to approach because you feel these women are in a different league to you. I’ve had that experience, my friends laughed at me, and vice versa. Why was I too scared? because now I’m a firm believer that everyone uses the toilet in the same way. They have the same problems as us, the same shithead exes as us, and the same money troubles as us. The only thing that’s probably different in their lives in the dating arena is that they have a far better choice than what we have. Beautiful women, or just women in general for that matter, have more choice than what men have. It’s just the way it happens.

Beautiful women as described by society

Some may say that because they have more choice then they are able to afford to dismiss and be rude to others, some say they are just plain rude to other people, and let’s face it - the media doesn’t do them much favours realistically. Statistically, a person is more likely to have a negative thought about a person they find super attractive than a positive one. But, that stems from our own insecurities. Weird, isn’t it? That our own lack of self confidence plays a hand on how we see and act with other people? Especially those that attract us?

It might also be worth noting that many beautiful women and hot men from all walks of life spend a good part of their existence beating off crap advances with a pitchfork. You know the ones, right? Men, sending their penises to your inbox, women, thinking that all you want is sex and there is nothing more to you as a person. I don’t blame them though, I mean, they haven’t had the opportunities to grow and learn as I and others have, it might just mean that they have to take themselves away and grow a little bit more.

Us men, we have lost the art of communication, I actually don’t even know if we really had it in the first place. But the Internet has made it far worse. I was blown away when I first found out that dick pics were a thing. Like, men, actually sending out pictures of their genitals to women? Is this a new form of flashing? I don’t know. I’ve yet to get my head around it. And there are the dating guru’s, that will tell thousands of men there is a certain way to be, ‘a system’ that needs to be gamed in order to bring beautiful women, or the woman you like to bed. It might, for a while yes, when done right, but what they don’t tell you is that their system is just that, a short term result, designed to bring you back for more. What happens when your new found partner sits you down and wants to learn the deeper layers to you? Trust me, this is where I failed every damn time with previous partners. (Subscribing to my list for my ebook would be good for this)

We’re all broken - that’s actually a good thing

There were no deeper layers.

And it sort of feeds into the toxic mentality that there are a group of ‘beautiful women’ out there that are prettier than the rest, better than the rest. It’s why after when we leave School we never really shake that mentality off, always looking for the small elite group of pretty girls, when actually, if you talked to a lot of men, you’d find their tastes vary wildly. We may be far vainer than women, but again, beautiful women is so broad a spectrum for us you wouldn’t believe me if I told you.

And we forget about this, and it’s where everyone, absolutely everyone that’s selling something to you chips a piece off. You’re broken and need fixed, you’re imperfect and need to be perfect. But it’s wrong. Whatever happened to just being that little bit broken and imperfect? What’s wrong with that? It’s why we essentially get together with another partner, to heal the broken parts of our lives that we can’t do on our own. And yes, beautiful women are no more, or less broken and imperfect than you or I, or any more, or less beautiful for that matter. As I said right at the start, beauty is firmly in the eye of the beholder.

And my thoughts are that we should stop focusing on group beauty, group mentality, us men. Because I feel that would make females less competitive with one another, less bitchy, less stand-offish. I blame the media with their intolerable standards on female beauty, and the men that find this acceptable. If I look at my wife it’s not the fact that she has long and curvy legs that drive me wild, it’s those small bumps and imperfections on them, that makes her, her. That’s healthier in my honest opinion

Let’s start realising that beauty is completely subjective.