Kids. Honestly, you know absolutely nothing.

Kids. Honestly, you know absolutely nothing

My Son is growing up to be really hard headed. He knows what he wants and if he doesn’t get what he wants then he’ll try and battle to get it. He’s six. And already he’s battling me for control over the TV changer, best seat in the house and control of the Xbox. It’s a never ending battle with my Son. But he’s only learning. He’s six years old. I can give him that.

I always laugh to myself when he finds out something new and wildly interesting about the world we’re in. He’ll show us like it’s something we’ve never seen it before. Explain to us what it is, and give us all the information surrounding it. Of course, we’ll know. But he needs to feel like it’s new, wonderous and he proudly wants to show an adult what he’s found, or realised. It’s all part of growing up I guess.

kids exploring

I remember being a teenager, and well into my 20’s. Perhaps it’s just me but I remember being invinci-fucking-ble. Adults were like these play things that are wheeled out of their coffins every day to feed us and dish out punishments. What would they ever know about growing up? They were never 16. Boy were they never 16. It had never occurred to me that my parents were ever young. They had been dodging the coffin ever since they were born. Came out whole. Anything that was remotely ‘awesome’ was completely the polar opposite of my Mum and Dad. Their fun was being boring.

I can remember listening to my friends. Taking their advice over mums. It’s like my friend KNOWS me, Jesus mum. You know nothing. Stop trying to tell me things you know nothing about. The thought had never occurred to me that Mum had gone to all the same Schools as me, drank in the same bars and danced in the same clubs. Yup, Mum knew nothing.

And when my friends and I were trying to pull a fast one over our parents it was always through some insane fluke of nature that they all found out. Not that, as teenagers they had tried the same shit and gave the same excuses. Yeah, I remember the time we all said we were staying at Andrews house, and Andrew was staying at mine. Funny that we never got an inch over the threshold of our homes. They knew. We didn’t think Adult intuition, we thought fluke!

fluke of nature

As a 27-year-old and sort-of-wisening up young man, I remember when this 18-year-old took me aside to give me his all of one year experience on dating and relationships. I had to laugh really, albeit I was somewhat angry at the time. Not being a parent and not being aware of the blissful naivete of young, invincible people were probably factors to my growing anger. I remember when he sat me down at the table and told me:

“Raymond, you have to keep your options open, man”

This was after a very young, and pretty lady had taken me aside and tried to have her way with me, but I gently declined because by then I had been seeing Natalie for a Month. I remember the people I was in the club with me, ranging from 18-23, I was somewhat the older one of the bunch. They pushed me, and shoved me, and laughed at me because they thought I was being stupid. But as a young 18 year old you would think I was being stupid. I would have at 18.

Safe to say that was the last time I ever went out with them!

Yes. It’s tough old slog being young, knowing everything, and being literally invincible. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

So when I see Alex telling me how to play my games on the Xbox, and educating me on how to speak proper English, and to annunciate my words better, since he’s learning English currently. I quietly laugh to myself. Yes, I know I have a lot in store, and to come. This time, I’ll be the one wheeled out of the study from my coffin with no formal education or experience in life at all. Just to bark orders at my poor unsuspecting Alex, and perhaps, on occasion, give huggles when needed.

invincible teenager

Kids. Honestly, you know absolutely nothing

I’m a man that’s been through the pitfalls and elations of relationships in my ever growing quest to better my knowledge in the human condition. I’ve been in the game and around the Internet since 1996 and surprisingly I’m still using it today. I’ve definitely found myself in some weird and wonderful places and I hope to share all of this with you lucky people.

We will be happy to hear your thoughts

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