Why we have changed, but really haven’t

Why we have changed, but really haven’t

The Internet. The cloud, the WWW. Webcams, smartphones, tablets and a plethora of other electronic devices have obliterated the way that humans interact with one another. Take just twenty years ago when, as a young and enthusiastic male, standing to attention with his bunch of flowers and smartly cropped hair would wait at the doorstep of his potential date only to have her house mate (or mother) tell you that she’s out with friends. What do you do? Go home? Wait? Do something else? You see there were no instant messaging systems back then. We couldn’t calculate the whereabouts of one another with gps, we couldn’t ask our friends where they were before we rolled out on them. Tough times!

Welll, not so tough times. I find 20 years ago a lot simpler. Back then we didn’t lead double lives, because that’s what we do respectively on the Internet. I know of no-one that’s life is as perfect as it is on social media. Think of social media as a snapshot of the awesomeness of our lives; all the hidden junk, the hard times and the grievances, it gets sweeped under the carpet. Perhaps that’s a bad thing. I don’t know. Perhaps people forget how real the world is as we get swept up by the fluffiness of Facebook, and why bad news is harder to take.

That being said dating has changed inexplicably since I was a young boy. Back when I was a lad we were limited to the secludedness of our own areas, we chatted up people that we knew and dating someone from the next town was more sacrilege than excitement. Now we can log onto the computer and spark up a conversation with someone from Mongolia, as a British National I can take up residency anywhere in Europe and date someone from there. Websites, dating apps and the Internet has broadened our boundaries in more ways than one could even imagine. If you talked to me about this 23 years ago I would have laughed and made you a tin foil hat. You would have too!

That being said we haven’t changed at all. Nope. Not one iota. We’re still the same people with the same agendas and the same thought processes. Broadening our boundaries has changed the way in which we assimilate information but it hasn’t changed the way in which we perceive it. The womaniser still womanises; he can do it from afar now, and anonymously. The serial cheater can still have the same amount of relationships behind their partners back. Men who don’t voice their opinions very much because they are scared to, shout from the hilltops now, but they still have that same self-denial burning inside. In fact the giving people are still as giving and the loving people just as loving. Why has nothing changed?

Because we haven’t taken the steps on an evolutionary scale to change. Change in a species happens over thousands, no hundreds of thousands of years. We adapt, we learn, we divulge. This has been over a span of less than twenty years, that’s only one generation and clearly not a time limit in which our gene pool can adapt to.

So the next time someone says “Wow, hasn’t the world changed? Tell them, actually, it has, but we haven’t”


why we've changed but havent

I'm a man that's been through the pitfalls and elations of relationships in my ever growing quest to better my knowledge in the human condition. I've been in the game and around the Internet since 1996 and surprisingly I'm still using it today. I've definitely found myself in some weird and wonderful places and I hope to share all of this with you lucky people.

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