Falling in love is easy, but staying in love is the hardest part. When you and your partner have been together for a long time now, you will find that the initial feeling of sparks and butterflies in the stomach and romance fades away. What remains is that feeling of love and determination to stay together. Here are key tips to help you bring back that shine and sparkle in your love life:
- Get physical
With physical touch, the body releases hormones called oxytocin. These hormones help regulate stress, make you feel closer to the person touching you, and can even give you a stronger immune system. Here are some ways for you to get physical with your significant other:
- Give each other a massage
- Hug each other
- Hold each other’s hands
- Kiss each other
When you do any of those mentioned above, and other tips from omg kinky, you will recapture the intimacy that might have been lost over time, as your body sends messages of love and positivity to your brain. It is when you touch each other that you fully realize how much you actually miss that level of closeness, especially if you have already fallen far apart from each other.
- Remember how it all started
You did not fall into each other’s lives for no reason, and you chose to be with each other despite the billions of other men or women in the world. Back when you first started, everything felt so exciting. Take time to remember the old times to bring back those feelings again. Walk through the memory lane of the following:
- Your first hi’s and hello’s
- Your first date
- Your first hug and kiss
- Your first trip together
- All your other firsts as a couple and exciting memories
Go back to the qualities that first attracted you to each other, and look at your loved one now. Be reminded that the person you fell in love with before is still the same now, and those qualities and emotions are still there.
- Practice an attitude of gratitude
Sure, your loved one isn’t perfect, but you aren’t either. You both adjust to each other every day, and there are certainly traits that you may not agree with each other. However, do remember that there might be others out there who see your loved one as someone positive, someone they will be grateful to have in their life. As you go through each day in your relationship, try to practice an attitude of gratitude by highlighting each other’s strengths and being grateful to each other about that. Instead of speaking degrading and insulting words, compliment each other and remind yourselves of how thankful you are to be in each other’s lives.
- Smile at each other always
A smile in one’s face radiates positivity and cheerfulness. When you see your loved one, or when your spouse wakes up in the morning, try your best to give out a smile. Do so even if you do not feel like the happiest person that day. When you do this, you can trick your mind into creating more positive energy throughout the day, where you can forget any feelings of anger, sadness or resentment towards each other.
- Declutter your love life
Decluttering should not only be done in the physical aspects of your life, such as your home, your office, or your car. You should do the same in your relationship as well. Some trash that you may want to declutter include:
- People who may have created nothing but a mess and oozed toxic energy in your relationship
- Feelings of hatred or regret toward each other
- Mistakes and lapses in the past that you cannot seem to let go of
When you leave any of these burdens behind, you can move on with your love life, where you carry nothing but love, positivity, and acceptance.
- Be apologetic
One way or another, you may have caused pain or hurt the feelings of your loved one. You may have unresolved conflicts only because you failed to realize your shortcomings or accept that you started the fight. Be the first to apologize. Say, “I’m sorry” for everything that you have done in the past that you have failed to apologize for.
- Be attentive to your partner’s feelings
In today’s fast-paced world, there is often the tendency to neglect and forget the feelings of loved ones. Sometimes, you may fail to give attention to the little details that may show that they are having a bad day, or that they may be feeling ill, or perhaps, they feel sad about something. Be attentive to any behavioral changes that your loved one is showing, as this can easily uplift them and make them feel that you genuinely care.
- Put down your gadgets
It is a worldwide phenomenon: most people are glued to their cell phones and gadgets, and there is a tendency among individuals to create their own bubble, enclosing their world. If you continue to do this while you are together with your partner or spouse, you will continue to drift away emotionally and even physically from each other. Do not let your social media accounts and gadgets be the monster in your relationship. Make it a habit to put your phone down, especially when you are on a date, or on the rare chance you get together due to your busy lives.
- Listen when your partner talks
When you talk to each other, do listen. Do not just hear what your loved one is saying, let it go through your other ear, and forget about it all. Empathize, and make their concerns your concerns as well. When your partner talks, give them time to talk, as sometimes they are not looking for advice—they are only looking for a listening ear. By the simple act of listening to your loved one, you will instantly make them feel cared for, and show them that their thoughts matter.
The Bottom Line
A happy and exciting love life goes beyond dates, gifts, and other physical attributes. It goes to the core, to that deeper feeling of continually wanting to be with the same person for the rest of your life. No relationship is ever perfect, and it does take a lot of hard work. However, every effort you put into your love life will undoubtedly be worth it if you feel that spark of romance once again.