Relationships
What To Do When He Ignores You? What Do You Do?
What to do when he ignores you? I know how you feel. I’ve been ignored by a few women in the past. It hurts, doesn’t it? The not knowing, the confusion, and to top it all off, if anything bad is going on in his head there’s absolutely no closure for you.
He just ignores you.
I get it, been there before plenty of times with women myself. I’m a terrible worrier and I’m prone to big bouts of anxiety and depression. My usual default was going straight to the worst case scenario and then panicking when she was more than likely just busy, scaring her off in the end. Thankfully, in time, I aged a bit, and also collected a bit of wisdom in my ol’ noggin over my various mishaps. I’ve a good idea of what to do when he ignores you.
Okay, so before I get into how to play that game with anyone; man or woman, I’d like to give you a few instances of what the matter can be, because if I’ve realised anything, it’s that with life there can be a lot of reasons why someone is giving you the cold shoulder, and it’s not all bad. So before you dive off the deep end in a panicked frenzy as I used to do, hear me out for a little bit.
Firstly he could just be busy - what to do when he ignores you
I remember after the second date my wife and I had; the previous night we went to the local circus and then afterwards for a long walk along the moonlit beach with typical seaside candyfloss. I enjoyed myself thoroughly. The next day I hadn’t heard from her all day; she wasn’t answering her phone and I started to panic. I didn’t hear from her until the very next day. I had thought she wasn’t interested, that I had done something wrong; damn, a million things went through my head at the time — but well, her grandmother had taken ill and she got caught up with that.
Men are also very focused, so if you’re wondering what to do when he ignores you, we’re probably busy doing something we enjoy and all our concentration is on whatever it is that we’re doing. Take that as a good thing. He wont be by your side every waking moment in the future.
He could just be inexperienced
I’ve seen a lot of articles equivocating men that are making ladies wait purposely to keep them engaged as a show of power, especially when searching for what to do when he ignores you, but usually (or more often than not) it’s just an inexperienced man listening to what his friends are saying about the dating game. When I was dating, many of my friends held the notion that you couldn’t seem too interested or she would run away; mainly that translated into don’t be too keen. And often us guys with very little dating experience will purposely ignore your phone-calls and texts to keep you interested (seems weird, I know). It’s somewhat ironic because from my experience it usually puts women off.
But then again he could actually be playing games with you
There are men out there that will purposely hang up on you during a phone conversation that was going awesome just to maintain that power. Whilst I said earlier that generally the main percentage of men don’t do this, there are a select few that will. I have been a magnet for these types of people in the past, men and women, and their intentions are not good at all. I mean don’t get me wrong in their minds they are perfectly good human beings, and what they are doing is how to play the game, and how they’ve been successful previously — but make sure you’re one step ahead of these guys. I tend to be a realist with these things.
Sometimes we just need to destress and have our space
It’s 01:38 right now and I’m writing this article. I haven’t talked to my wife since 10pm and she’s asleep in bed. We’re perfectly fine with this and it works for us because some people need alone time to be lost in their thoughts, or getting on with something that gives them pleasure — I’m not being rude here. I write to destress and I’m usually 100% alone when I do that. It’s good for me. Some people just need to recharge after a hard day. Whatever you do, don’t take that personally.
He could be punishing you.
Some men (and women) like to punish their significant others by with-holding conversation from them. It’s a feature of relationships I’ve never really been into, and when my wife tries this with me I usually end up shouting at her. That doesn’t mean it’s the end though, it’s just that some people learn from a very young age that an effective mode of punishment is to stop talking to you when they are angry about something. Maybe a family member was susceptible to this and they learned it was a way to get attention from childhood.
When you’re wondering what to do when he ignores you with this guy, think of it as his way of having an argument with you, albeit going about it in an immature way.
Or sadly, he may just not be into you.
I know it’s not what you want to hear, because I know that you’re this awesome, amazing & beautiful woman, and here his is, losing a chance of a lifetime, but sadly, sometimes it just doesn’t work. It’s hard not to take it personally, but certainly it takes two to make things work, and if he’s not willing to make that effort with you now — then think of it as you’ve dodged a bullet. Nothing worse than being married to a man that isn’t too interested in you.
And last but not least — how the game is played if he’s inexperienced or trying to punish you.
Okay, so down to the nitty gritty. Like.. what do you do?
It’s going to be hard, but ignore him back. Don’t feed into that bullshit immature ignoring tactics. Sure he may be inexperienced, and it may give you butterflies when he finally does get in touch but don’t rise to his game. If he’s busy he will contact you later
If he’s playing games or trying to punish you then he’ll eventually contact you — and it will be him that is the one that’s feeling punished. He’ll come back with his tail between his legs.
If he’s not into you then he’ll maybe make a half-arsed attempt to contact you but don’t hold your breath. Do you really want the guy that couldn’t be arsed to phone to be in a relationship with you? Could you imagine the disinterest? Bullet dodged.
And for that, I hope this has been useful! I really do!